At this time of year, the world seems to speed up. The invitations, the errands, the noise, the pressure to squeeze more into the calendar—more plans, more tasks, more proof that we’re keeping up.
But my body—and something deeper than my body—has been asking for the opposite.
What I’m feeling is a soft unraveling. A quiet purging. A gentle closing of doors that don’t need to stay open anymore. It feels less like hustle and more like exhale. Less like “what’s next?” and more like “what’s mine to finish, honour and lay to rest?”
In numerology, 2025 is a collective Year 9—an ending year. A completion year. A final chapter before the slate wipes clean. And next year—2026—begins a Year 1 cycle of new beginnings. I can feel that. I can feel the tide pulling back so the new wave can arrive.
I’m not here to start anything new right now.
I’m here to close.
And interestingly, this mirrors my astrology too. With the Sun in Sagittarius, it’s moving through my 12th house—the final house before the cycle begins again for me in Capricorn season. The last stretch before the reset. The archetypal place of clearing, cleansing and calling my spirit back home before my next trip around the Sun as a January baby.
The energetic equivalent of turning out the lights, locking the door and whispering a quiet thank you before bed.
So instead of rushing, I’ve been returning to presence — letting it shape my days in small, tangible ways. Baths and books. Walks that don’t need a destination. Food made slowly. Laughter. Orgasms. Quiet mornings. Even quieter evenings. Time in the garden and time tending myself alongside it.
And somewhere in that slowness, a clarity arrived:
This isn’t a pause before my real life.
This is my real life.
For a long time, I treated my work like a separate container — something to push through, prove myself through, muscle my way into. Time became a pressure cooker. I tried to compress entire weeks into single days, to fit a full creative life inside corporate-shaped expectations, even though I’ve always known I’m not built for that world.
I don’t thrive inside someone else’s rigid structure. I don’t have consistent, linear energy as a (Human Design) Manifestor. I’m not here to work in long, uninterrupted stretches unless something genuinely piques my curiosity enough to follow inspiration down rabbit holes — and when it does, I can create months’ worth of work in a week. But that’s a conversation for another day.
What I am here for is a rhythm that feels human. A life where I work a little, play a little, rest a lot, create in pulses, tend my garden and let life and work exist in the same ecosystem rather than competing worlds.
What I’m building is a life I can be generously compensated for living.
With that realisation came something unexpectedly childlike and thrilling — a return to an old dream. The lifestyle publication energy I once imagined when I was young. An online magazine that feels like a ritual: a cup of tea, a pause in the day, a window into a beautifully lived life.
Not content built around productivity.
Not content driven by pressure or performance.
But content rooted in pleasure, presence and the quiet art of living.
This email isn’t an announcement or a rebrand. It’s simply a truth I’m allowing myself to name. I’m leaning into lifestyle. I’m creating from what feels nourishing. I’m building rhythms that honour the woman I actually am and letting my work reflect the life I’m living — rather than racing ahead of it.
I’ve been quietly working on my version of an online lifestyle magazine and I’d love you to explore rhianbudd.com — the new home of my writing and creative expression.
Despite the mainstream narrative, this season isn’t about achievement. It’s about completion. About softness. About coming home to yourself before beginning again.
When the new year arrives — and when the Sun moves into Capricorn — I’ll be ready. Not because I pushed harder, but because I rested more deeply. Because I closed what was meant to close. Because I honoured the ending.
For now, I’m letting this be a slow, delicious wind-down. A final chapter written with presence. A lifestyle shaped around pleasure. A life I get to live — and create from — every single day.
This will be my last email of the year as I offer you, my beautiful readers, the same spaciousness I’m leaning into. If you’re looking for something nourishing to sink into over the holidays, I’ve also curated a summer reading list featuring the most memorable books I read this year — from cozy escapes to more intense, transformative stories.
May we all wrap up 2025 with softness, clarity and a deeper sense of self. I’ll be back in the new year with more stories from the in-between.
Happiest of holidays and merriest of Christmases to you, beautiful friend.
Rhi xx
